Debrief:
It's now a few months since I finished my diet. I stopped writing the blog not because I fell off the wagon or anything, but simply because once I finished the very strict part of the diet and was being weaned back on to food I found that I didn't want to be thinking about food the whole time. I realised that the less I thought about food the easier it was to keep on the straight and narrow.
So my apologies to everyone for deserting you, but rest assured for anyone who cares, I have now been off the diet for a few months, I put on only 2lbs in that time, which is absolutely astounding and which makes me grin every morning when I look in the morning.
Now that my weight has stabilised at 4stone less than I was at the start of this process and I've gone a few months being responsible for my own weight and monitoring my own food intake and I've done well on that, I'm going to try and lose the last 2 stone that will make me 10 stone and healthy. So that's phase 3, and I'm going to do it slowly and I'm going to enjoy it. Because actually, healthy food is pretty darned nice!
After the video I made where I took a photo of myself every day in my swimming costume so that you can watch the fat being sucked out of me, Howards Way commissioned my brother to make a complete web advert for them. My brother is a really talented animator, and he started a company called Slurpy Studios a few years back which is doing really good. I really enjoyed this video, so hopefully you guys will too.
Thursday 16 April 2009
Saturday 17 January 2009
3 stone in 10 seconds
It's finally time to tell you all about something that I've been doing throughout this diet that I've been really excited about, but that I've not mentioned because I didn't know how well it'd work. My big brother Aaron is an animator, and he got me to take a photograph of myself every day in the same position and in the same outfit (my swimming costume). Then he put them all together in a little film so that you can see me losing the weight!
I think it's seriously awesome! I honestly never thought there was so much of a difference in the before and after shots, but I look like a completely different person and I know which one I prefer! Anyway, check it out!
Amazing right! I just keep watching it and scrolling back and forwards and watching all that weight falling off! But it got me wondering; where exactly does all that weight go? I mean, I know I 'burned it off' by only eating the amount of calories I was actually using and all of that, but what happens when it's burnt? Does it just evaporate, does it ooze out of my body in my sleep, do I (excuse the crassness) poo it all out??? I thought I understood all of this stuff, but look at that video, that's about half of my body weight that's disappeared there! Does that make me less of a person? Are there bits of flab floating around that were once attached to my butt?
I understand liposuction, because you can physically see the stuff that's coming out, but where exactly has my flab gone!?! Not that I want to sent it a postcard or anything, it's just that I was rather attached to it for a long time and I find it bizarre that I can have lost so much of myself and have no idea where it's gone!
Hope you enjoy the video :) It's not all over from me, I still have 4 weeks of 'refeeding' to ween me slowly back on to normal food, and I still have loads to learn about what to avoid and how strong I am around various 'trigger' foods, but this is the end of phase one. And from the video, I'm going to go right out there and call it an unparalleled success.
I think it's seriously awesome! I honestly never thought there was so much of a difference in the before and after shots, but I look like a completely different person and I know which one I prefer! Anyway, check it out!
Amazing right! I just keep watching it and scrolling back and forwards and watching all that weight falling off! But it got me wondering; where exactly does all that weight go? I mean, I know I 'burned it off' by only eating the amount of calories I was actually using and all of that, but what happens when it's burnt? Does it just evaporate, does it ooze out of my body in my sleep, do I (excuse the crassness) poo it all out??? I thought I understood all of this stuff, but look at that video, that's about half of my body weight that's disappeared there! Does that make me less of a person? Are there bits of flab floating around that were once attached to my butt?
I understand liposuction, because you can physically see the stuff that's coming out, but where exactly has my flab gone!?! Not that I want to sent it a postcard or anything, it's just that I was rather attached to it for a long time and I find it bizarre that I can have lost so much of myself and have no idea where it's gone!
Hope you enjoy the video :) It's not all over from me, I still have 4 weeks of 'refeeding' to ween me slowly back on to normal food, and I still have loads to learn about what to avoid and how strong I am around various 'trigger' foods, but this is the end of phase one. And from the video, I'm going to go right out there and call it an unparalleled success.
Monday 12 January 2009
The end is coming!!!
Do you ever get that feeling, that smugly satisfied feeling of being right about something and proving to everyone that you're stronger than they thought you were?
That feeling's been growing inside me since Christmas, because it was really Christmas when I finally knew, and not just knew, but KNEW knew, that I was going to finish this diet and lose the weight that they said I'd lose. Since I started I had a feeling that Christmas was going to be the point at which I failed, having made a valiant stab at it, and lapsed back in to old habits with a giant bowl of icecream to console me.
But it didn't happen! And for practically the first time in my life I'm a week away from actually finishing something! Because I'm not one of life's great finishers of things. Hobbies, jigsaws, academic pursuits... all started with so much enthusiasm and commitment (except the jigsaws, they're normally started with boredom and an vague attempt towards 'family time'), but all dropped within a few weeks. This time I'm one week away, and aint nothing going to stop me!
AND I'M NOT OBESE ANYMORE!!! I always said that was my goal, to be out of the scary deep red zone on the BMI chart and into the slightly less luminous orangey 'overweight'! I'm OVERWEIGHT! Big tick on goal achieved there. Party hats all around.
One week to go and I've got mixed feelings about it all. It only means the end of the program, not the end of the diet obviously, but it does mean and end to the support and I've been thinking alot recently about how much that's meant. Not just the support of the locums on the end of the phone (which I think I may have overused slightly!!!), or the support of my family, but the support of people I see everyday telling me I'm looking good or my goodness aren't I looking thin. As I wont be losing weight so fast I wont get that so much, and, ridiculously vain though I'm aware this is, I'm going to miss it.
PS. BIG DATE IS TOMORROW!!! I have my outfit all sorted out, I've been given HUGE amounts of advice from all sorts of conflicting sources and my insides turn to jelly everytime I think about it. I think I'm nearly ready!
That feeling's been growing inside me since Christmas, because it was really Christmas when I finally knew, and not just knew, but KNEW knew, that I was going to finish this diet and lose the weight that they said I'd lose. Since I started I had a feeling that Christmas was going to be the point at which I failed, having made a valiant stab at it, and lapsed back in to old habits with a giant bowl of icecream to console me.
But it didn't happen! And for practically the first time in my life I'm a week away from actually finishing something! Because I'm not one of life's great finishers of things. Hobbies, jigsaws, academic pursuits... all started with so much enthusiasm and commitment (except the jigsaws, they're normally started with boredom and an vague attempt towards 'family time'), but all dropped within a few weeks. This time I'm one week away, and aint nothing going to stop me!
AND I'M NOT OBESE ANYMORE!!! I always said that was my goal, to be out of the scary deep red zone on the BMI chart and into the slightly less luminous orangey 'overweight'! I'm OVERWEIGHT! Big tick on goal achieved there. Party hats all around.
One week to go and I've got mixed feelings about it all. It only means the end of the program, not the end of the diet obviously, but it does mean and end to the support and I've been thinking alot recently about how much that's meant. Not just the support of the locums on the end of the phone (which I think I may have overused slightly!!!), or the support of my family, but the support of people I see everyday telling me I'm looking good or my goodness aren't I looking thin. As I wont be losing weight so fast I wont get that so much, and, ridiculously vain though I'm aware this is, I'm going to miss it.
PS. BIG DATE IS TOMORROW!!! I have my outfit all sorted out, I've been given HUGE amounts of advice from all sorts of conflicting sources and my insides turn to jelly everytime I think about it. I think I'm nearly ready!
Wednesday 7 January 2009
Diet trousers
I've been looking at a lot of diet sites today, and I'm really excited about something...
I can't WAIT to take my cheesy photo with my old trousers pulled out to show how much weight I've lost!!! At the start of the day I thought those photos were slightly ridiculous and completely overused, but after an entire day surfing the net I've come to see them as the pinnacle of dieting success! I may even have to buy special giant trousers just to illustrate the point (although my stupid brother informs me that I may have missed the point of the exercise...)
So what, I hear you asking yourselves in a bemused sort of way, prompted this day of research? Well it was lots of things really. First of all I was at work and so had nothing better to do.
Secondly I've been feeling a bit down about the diet since Christmas - I was allowed to eat a pretty normal Christmas meal, and although I enjoyed it I kinda wish I hadn't. It's made my tummy start feeling a bit funny again and brought back the constipation that you all enjoyed hearing about so much. Then I started back at work and I've been getting so many amazing comments from people who haven't seen me for a few weeks about how thin I look that I've been buzzing all day and couldn't think about anything else.
And thirdly, possibly most importantly, is because of my sister. She's done the traditional thing of overeating at Christmas with the resolve of losing weight in January (gyms must just adore this time of year!), but she's decided to lose the weight in the most idiotic, mindless way possible. All those people who sucked in their breath when they heard my weightloss scheme of nutritionally balanced milkshakes and careful medical attention must just be in hysterics when they hear my GENIUS sister's plan! She's going to do a milkshake diet (clearly I am a shining example), but she's decided she can't afford to do a proper one so she's brought a bunch of Slimfast milkshakes and has vowed to eat nothing else.
Bloody idiot!
So I've spent the day researching other diet plans and trying to find one that suits her so that I can talk her out of it. I did a bunch of research when I first started, so consider myself the expert in the family, but I wanted to do some more with an insiders knowledge so that I could present her with a slightly more rational plan.
I decided that I liked Howard's Way actually. They've made this whole thing pretty darned easy because they do meetings and medical checkups and phone support and other stuff like that which helps people like me who only make an effort when everything is laid out on a plate! I'd be interested in hearing more about some of the other plans too - I've heard a lot about Lighter Life, but I don't think they teach you so much about eating healthy when you finish the diet and I was really scared about putting it back on through not really knowing what was bad for me!
So I'm trying to get her to abandon the crazy plan and either just eat healthy (she's not nearly as large as I was) or to lose 3 stone with HW.
I can't WAIT to take my cheesy photo with my old trousers pulled out to show how much weight I've lost!!! At the start of the day I thought those photos were slightly ridiculous and completely overused, but after an entire day surfing the net I've come to see them as the pinnacle of dieting success! I may even have to buy special giant trousers just to illustrate the point (although my stupid brother informs me that I may have missed the point of the exercise...)
So what, I hear you asking yourselves in a bemused sort of way, prompted this day of research? Well it was lots of things really. First of all I was at work and so had nothing better to do.
Secondly I've been feeling a bit down about the diet since Christmas - I was allowed to eat a pretty normal Christmas meal, and although I enjoyed it I kinda wish I hadn't. It's made my tummy start feeling a bit funny again and brought back the constipation that you all enjoyed hearing about so much. Then I started back at work and I've been getting so many amazing comments from people who haven't seen me for a few weeks about how thin I look that I've been buzzing all day and couldn't think about anything else.
And thirdly, possibly most importantly, is because of my sister. She's done the traditional thing of overeating at Christmas with the resolve of losing weight in January (gyms must just adore this time of year!), but she's decided to lose the weight in the most idiotic, mindless way possible. All those people who sucked in their breath when they heard my weightloss scheme of nutritionally balanced milkshakes and careful medical attention must just be in hysterics when they hear my GENIUS sister's plan! She's going to do a milkshake diet (clearly I am a shining example), but she's decided she can't afford to do a proper one so she's brought a bunch of Slimfast milkshakes and has vowed to eat nothing else.
Bloody idiot!
So I've spent the day researching other diet plans and trying to find one that suits her so that I can talk her out of it. I did a bunch of research when I first started, so consider myself the expert in the family, but I wanted to do some more with an insiders knowledge so that I could present her with a slightly more rational plan.
I decided that I liked Howard's Way actually. They've made this whole thing pretty darned easy because they do meetings and medical checkups and phone support and other stuff like that which helps people like me who only make an effort when everything is laid out on a plate! I'd be interested in hearing more about some of the other plans too - I've heard a lot about Lighter Life, but I don't think they teach you so much about eating healthy when you finish the diet and I was really scared about putting it back on through not really knowing what was bad for me!
So I'm trying to get her to abandon the crazy plan and either just eat healthy (she's not nearly as large as I was) or to lose 3 stone with HW.
Monday 29 December 2008
The most exciting news EVER part II
GUESS WHAT!!! I can't talk for long because I've got an entire night of TV scheduled (sad but true) but I wanted everyone here to know that he asked me out again!!! He rang me up this time, I have no idea where he got my phone number from, but after a slightly embarrassing conversation where I couldn't actually figure out who he was, he asked me to the cinema!
AND I SAID YES!!!
I think I probably always knew I'd say yes - all that umming and aahring was probably just a defence mechanism in case he didn't ask again, but as soon as he asked (once I'd figured out who it was) I said yes straight away! We're going to the cinema I think, next week once all the crazy New Year stuff is over. Just think how much weight I can lose by then!!!
Which means I'll be starting 2009 with an actual man who is actually interested in dating me! And I can't possibly mess it up before Jan 1st because I'm not even going to see him before then!
I'm noticing I use an awful lot of exclamation marks when I'm writing in this blog. My English teacher always said that they were a lazy way of showing excitement, and that I should let the emotion come through in the language instead. So Sir, if you're listening, I'm really seriously excited. Really.
AND there's a whole night of Sex and the City ahead of me!!
If this doesn't call for a giant party popper I don't know what does!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND I SAID YES!!!
I think I probably always knew I'd say yes - all that umming and aahring was probably just a defence mechanism in case he didn't ask again, but as soon as he asked (once I'd figured out who it was) I said yes straight away! We're going to the cinema I think, next week once all the crazy New Year stuff is over. Just think how much weight I can lose by then!!!
Which means I'll be starting 2009 with an actual man who is actually interested in dating me! And I can't possibly mess it up before Jan 1st because I'm not even going to see him before then!
I'm noticing I use an awful lot of exclamation marks when I'm writing in this blog. My English teacher always said that they were a lazy way of showing excitement, and that I should let the emotion come through in the language instead. So Sir, if you're listening, I'm really seriously excited. Really.
AND there's a whole night of Sex and the City ahead of me!!
If this doesn't call for a giant party popper I don't know what does!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Saturday 27 December 2008
Post Christmas weighing up
Hello all,
You'll be delighted to hear that I am infact not dead!
Neither have I fallen off the wagon or run away to the Carribean with the guy who asked me out a few weeks ago. I've just been a bit carried away with the whole Christmas thing!
It's been very exciting! First there was the 'what to wear at the Office Christmas Party' debate, which I'm sure you're gutted you missed out on. It was a huge decision of course, being an opportunity to show off the fact that I now have a neck and can walk rather than waddle, as well as being (I thought) the perfect opportunity for that guy to get up a little dutch courage and to ask me out again (no such luck). There've been lots of parties of course, but I haven't been to that many of them this year because a) can't drink, and although I'm not a huge drinker, watching people around me getting steadily more inebriated before collapsing in a corner and blubbering that everyone hates them is not my idea of fun and b) I'm mid-diet and didn't want to buy too many fancy outfits that wont fit me in a months time.
Then there was the whole 'Christmas meal,' which has always been really important to me as a family event and I was upset to think I might miss it, especially as it had been my birthday a few days before and I'd not had a cake or anything (ALTHOUGH, when people can't buy you chocolate as a present, you do get a lot more imaginative gifts, which was GREAT!!!). I got given a list of things I could and couldn't eat on the day, and actually it was quite relaxed. I thought they'd say I could have a slice of turkey and a piece of bread or something, but I was allowed pretty much everything except potatoes (I'm sure I should be able to tell you why, what with all the reading I've been doing, but I have no idea why potatos are so bad. Probably something to do with ketosis. Most things are.)
So that was great. I'm a bit worried now that I'll start craving foods again, especially as there's sooooo much about at the moment, but so far everytime I've had a craving, I've looked at those photos I posted a few days ago and that's got me through it.
I wanted to thank everyone by the way, for being so supportive of those photos. When I took the earlier photos I thought no one would ever see them except for me (Howard's Way recommend taking photos all the time, because actually, even though I've now lost 3 stone in 2.5 months, I wouldn't have thought there was much difference if I hadn't seen them), and it was pretty scary putting them up there, but everyone's been just so nice about it.
So now, as the rest of the country bemoans the fact that they've just eaten enough to feed a small developing country, is petrified of their credit card bill and is giving serious consideration to joining a gym, I'm still plodding away on my journey out of the purple area of the BMI chart, with a spring in my step and a tune on my tongue. Christmas was hard, but I made it. Bring on Easter!!!
You'll be delighted to hear that I am infact not dead!
Neither have I fallen off the wagon or run away to the Carribean with the guy who asked me out a few weeks ago. I've just been a bit carried away with the whole Christmas thing!
It's been very exciting! First there was the 'what to wear at the Office Christmas Party' debate, which I'm sure you're gutted you missed out on. It was a huge decision of course, being an opportunity to show off the fact that I now have a neck and can walk rather than waddle, as well as being (I thought) the perfect opportunity for that guy to get up a little dutch courage and to ask me out again (no such luck). There've been lots of parties of course, but I haven't been to that many of them this year because a) can't drink, and although I'm not a huge drinker, watching people around me getting steadily more inebriated before collapsing in a corner and blubbering that everyone hates them is not my idea of fun and b) I'm mid-diet and didn't want to buy too many fancy outfits that wont fit me in a months time.
Then there was the whole 'Christmas meal,' which has always been really important to me as a family event and I was upset to think I might miss it, especially as it had been my birthday a few days before and I'd not had a cake or anything (ALTHOUGH, when people can't buy you chocolate as a present, you do get a lot more imaginative gifts, which was GREAT!!!). I got given a list of things I could and couldn't eat on the day, and actually it was quite relaxed. I thought they'd say I could have a slice of turkey and a piece of bread or something, but I was allowed pretty much everything except potatoes (I'm sure I should be able to tell you why, what with all the reading I've been doing, but I have no idea why potatos are so bad. Probably something to do with ketosis. Most things are.)
So that was great. I'm a bit worried now that I'll start craving foods again, especially as there's sooooo much about at the moment, but so far everytime I've had a craving, I've looked at those photos I posted a few days ago and that's got me through it.
I wanted to thank everyone by the way, for being so supportive of those photos. When I took the earlier photos I thought no one would ever see them except for me (Howard's Way recommend taking photos all the time, because actually, even though I've now lost 3 stone in 2.5 months, I wouldn't have thought there was much difference if I hadn't seen them), and it was pretty scary putting them up there, but everyone's been just so nice about it.
So now, as the rest of the country bemoans the fact that they've just eaten enough to feed a small developing country, is petrified of their credit card bill and is giving serious consideration to joining a gym, I'm still plodding away on my journey out of the purple area of the BMI chart, with a spring in my step and a tune on my tongue. Christmas was hard, but I made it. Bring on Easter!!!
Tuesday 16 December 2008
CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!
I'm so excited about Christmas I can hardly sit down!
I thought a while ago that I wouldn't be able to get excited with the prospect of sitting at the table, sucking on my milkshake, while everyone else stuffs themselves stupid with turkey and brussel sprouts before retiring to the sitting room to fill any remaining belly space with the nasty toffee Quality Streets that have been left.
It's going to be a weird Christmas anyway because it's the first year my big brother Aaron's not going to be there, so I'll miss him nearly as much as I'll miss the food. It's not even the food really, it's just the activity of the food and the togetherness it brings - I'll still do lots of cooking and decorating and stuff, but Christmas is about family and the dinner is one of the few times when everyone is together and there's no arguments or rushing off to talk on mobiles or anything. Everyone else'll be tucking in to something we all cooked while I'll be savouring my oh so nutritous milkshake and I wont feel like a part of the same event/family.
Still, I like to keep traditions going, so I've made the Christmas Log and the Christmas Cake and mince pies and everything. I've mastered my impulses to snack whilst cooking, which was starting to make me look like I had a twitch or a hand that obeyed some unseen shoulder devil. I've found that I quite like cooking just for the fun of it, and I don't particularly want to eat the food I'm handling - its just nice to see other people enjoying it.
God I've changed actually! I've just noticed it as I typed that, but a month ago watching other people enjoying food was like watching them urinating on my grave, and now I'm actually providing them with food! I wonder what brought that on! Guess it must be the fact I'm turning 25 next week!
(see how I got that in all subtley? God I'm cunning!)
I have been told I'll be allowed something a bit different on Christmas day. There's a list of things I'll be allowed and things I wont be, so hopefully it'll include a few tasty bits. I don't know if that's a good thing or not to be honest, I certainly don't want the cravings to come back again but then I want to feel like a part of my family at Christmas. I want to be normal!
I thought a while ago that I wouldn't be able to get excited with the prospect of sitting at the table, sucking on my milkshake, while everyone else stuffs themselves stupid with turkey and brussel sprouts before retiring to the sitting room to fill any remaining belly space with the nasty toffee Quality Streets that have been left.
It's going to be a weird Christmas anyway because it's the first year my big brother Aaron's not going to be there, so I'll miss him nearly as much as I'll miss the food. It's not even the food really, it's just the activity of the food and the togetherness it brings - I'll still do lots of cooking and decorating and stuff, but Christmas is about family and the dinner is one of the few times when everyone is together and there's no arguments or rushing off to talk on mobiles or anything. Everyone else'll be tucking in to something we all cooked while I'll be savouring my oh so nutritous milkshake and I wont feel like a part of the same event/family.
Still, I like to keep traditions going, so I've made the Christmas Log and the Christmas Cake and mince pies and everything. I've mastered my impulses to snack whilst cooking, which was starting to make me look like I had a twitch or a hand that obeyed some unseen shoulder devil. I've found that I quite like cooking just for the fun of it, and I don't particularly want to eat the food I'm handling - its just nice to see other people enjoying it.
God I've changed actually! I've just noticed it as I typed that, but a month ago watching other people enjoying food was like watching them urinating on my grave, and now I'm actually providing them with food! I wonder what brought that on! Guess it must be the fact I'm turning 25 next week!
(see how I got that in all subtley? God I'm cunning!)
I have been told I'll be allowed something a bit different on Christmas day. There's a list of things I'll be allowed and things I wont be, so hopefully it'll include a few tasty bits. I don't know if that's a good thing or not to be honest, I certainly don't want the cravings to come back again but then I want to feel like a part of my family at Christmas. I want to be normal!
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